BottyWorm

[PEDANTICVINDICTIVEMAN]

My BottyWorm boiler has no pilot light and the digital display keps telling me I am a moron, I have directed the toxic flue gases back into my bedroom as it seems such a waste of heat for them to go outside, a friend at the pub who knows nothing about boilers said this was ok as it has only killed 10 out of 10 people who have done this, what do you think, he always seems so knowledgable after 10 pints or so, the non registered plumber wants £25,000 to come and bleed my ballcock, does this sound a fair price, anyway I will be in today for the Landlord to come and fit the Lego fire escape as we are on the third floor, I have agreed to test it for him, he is a nice chap even though I cant understand a word he says as he is from Wazzarkstan and doesn't speak English, allways calls round to pick his rent up on Mondays as he passes to collect his Benefit form the post office, in the mean time should I bleed the radiators ?, the toilet overflow has stopped running now I have put a cork in the end of the pipe, could this be anything to do with the pilot light, and the bloke downstairs says his sugar is damp in his pantry below!
Can anyone help

 

[DP]

I would suggest you check for leak with a match. You must be competent as you have managed to clear a few faults. Do NOT get any CORGIS in as they will only mess up your carpet and the landlord will hold back your deposit (never mind the carpet was used by Adam and Eve)

 

[kevplumb]

are you sure the overflow from the loo wasnt dripping on the pilot light ?

 

[DP]

Take it Bottywarm boiler will be a Coldbotty boiler

 

[kevplumb]

wasnt there a recall on the bottywarm for noxious flue gases whilst in use

or was that the pottywarmer ?

 

[PEDANTICVINDICTIVEMAN]

The new BottyWarm condesending boiler is a crock of Sh**.

 

[kevplumb]

dont half make the bedroom damp

pedantic are you sure the condensation isnt dripping on the pilot

could be the answer

 

[PEDANTICVINDICTIVEMAN]

Being as the condensate on my new boiler is the same as lemon juice, my missis is putting it in her baking, Lemon cheescake tastes off though, somebody else said it was the same as tomato sauce, can I put it on my chips

Oh yea sorry missed the last bit as there is a lot of steam in the room, windows are running bad with condensation, they told me double glazing would fix it.

 

[kevplumb]

only tastes off till you get the flux out
do hope nobodys taking this thread seriously

 

[kevplumb]

just thought its a downward firing burner you havent fitted the boiler upside down have you

 

[PEDANTICVINDICTIVEMAN]

oops I thought the badge was on upside down, notrettop.

 

[DP]

Must get the flue gases analysed.

 

[kevplumb]

dont even go there dp

 

[blahblah]

Its PVM that needs analysing! No takers from the 'dee aye why are brill' camp though- surprising.

 

[kevplumb]

now theres a suprise its only cos we know that we do it