Subject: Employee Appraisal 'One Liners'
"Since his last appraisal, this employee has hit rock bottom and has started digging"
"His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of morbid curiosity"
"I would not allow this employee to breed"
"This employee is really not so much has been, but more of a definite won't be"
"When she opens her mouth, it seems it's only to change feet"
"This lady has delusions of adequacy"
"He sets low personal standards and then constantly fails to achieve them"
"This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot"
"This employee should go far, and the sooner he starts the better"
"Got a full 6-pack but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together"
"A gross ignoramus - 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus"
"He certainly takes a long time to make his pointless"
"He doesn't have ulcers, but he's a carrier"'
"He has a knack of making strangers immediately"
"He brings joy to others, when he leaves the room"
"When his IQ reaches 50, he should sell"
"If you see two people talking and one looks bored - he's the other one"
"A photographic memory, but with the lens cover left on"
"A prime candidate for natural de-selection"
"Has two brains: one is lost, the other is out looking for it"
"If he was any more stupid he'd have to be watered"
"If you gave him a penny for his thoughts you'd get change"
"It's hard to believe that he beat a million other sperm"
"Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, he's only gargled"
"It takes him two hours to watch sixty minutes"
"The wheel is turning, but the hamster is dead"
"This man would have to study for a month to pass a urine test"
"Since his last appraisal, this employee has hit rock bottom and has started digging"
"His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of morbid curiosity"
"I would not allow this employee to breed"
"This employee is really not so much has been, but more of a definite won't be"
"When she opens her mouth, it seems it's only to change feet"
"This lady has delusions of adequacy"
"He sets low personal standards and then constantly fails to achieve them"
"This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot"
"This employee should go far, and the sooner he starts the better"
"Got a full 6-pack but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together"
"A gross ignoramus - 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus"
"He certainly takes a long time to make his pointless"
"He doesn't have ulcers, but he's a carrier"'
"He has a knack of making strangers immediately"
"He brings joy to others, when he leaves the room"
"When his IQ reaches 50, he should sell"
"If you see two people talking and one looks bored - he's the other one"
"A photographic memory, but with the lens cover left on"
"A prime candidate for natural de-selection"
"Has two brains: one is lost, the other is out looking for it"
"If he was any more stupid he'd have to be watered"
"If you gave him a penny for his thoughts you'd get change"
"It's hard to believe that he beat a million other sperm"
"Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, he's only gargled"
"It takes him two hours to watch sixty minutes"
"The wheel is turning, but the hamster is dead"
"This man would have to study for a month to pass a urine test"
