funny

[dpsservices]

distinguished young woman on a flight from Ireland asked the Priest beside
her, 'Father, may I ask a favour?'

'Of course, child. What may I do for you?'

'Well, I bought an expensive woman's electronic hair dryer for my mother's birthday that is unopened and well over the Customs limits, and i'm afraid they'll confiscate it. Is there any way you could carry it through
customs for me? Under your robes perhaps?'

'I would love to help you, dear, but I must warn you: I will not lie.'

'With your honest face, Father, no one will question you.'

When they got to Customs, she let the priest go ahead of her.
The official asked, 'Father, do you have anything to declare?'

'From the top of my head down to my waist, I have nothing to declare.'

The official thought this answer strange, so asked, 'And what do you have to
declare from your waist to the floor?'

'I have a marvelous instrument designed to be used on a woman, but which is,
to date, unused.'

Roaring with laughter, the official said, 'Go ahead, Father. Next!

 

[RigidRaider]

Forty people reportedly stuck to the platform at Dublin railway station after Irish Muslims set off a No More Nails bomb..

 

[Trazor]

A zoo has a new female rhino but she is clearly miserable. The vet tells them that she is lonely and craving male company.

After a quick search, on t'internet, they find a male that they can put with the lonely lady.

Two days later the male rhino arrives and is unloaded from the truck and put into quarantine for the vet to give a quick health check.
He is a large handsome beast and the keepers are excited to introduce the new couple.

The next morning he is let into the compound and the keepers are delighted to see him go straight into the females sleeping quarters.
They hear all sorts of grunting noises but decide that all will be well.

Meanwhile, laid back in the straw after passionate sex (of the rhino variety) the now smiling lady rhino turns to her new mate and says,
"anyway, I'm Alice, what's your name?" The big fella turns and says "my name is Neil".


"Wow" exclaims Alice "I can't wait to tell all the girls that I've slept with Rhino Neil!"

 

[LastMagicBean]

"anyway, I'm Alice, what's your name?" The big fella turns and says "my name is Neil".
"Wow" exclaims Alice "I can't wait to tell all the girls that I've slept with Rhino Neil!"

So THEN what did Neil say..?????????