Personal confessions

[ban-all-sheds]

OK - as I said, who hasn't done something really daft with technology at some point? So here's your chance to 'fess up.

I'll start.

I once got a modem dialling number wrong, and when I tried to connect, the modem speaker made the usual bleeping noises, and then I got the voice of the person at the other end who'd answered the phone.

For some reason I then behaved as though my modem had become a speaker phone, and started talking at it, expecting the other person to be able to hear me....

 

[mandiehun]

i really lost my temper with a new cordless mouse i bought, i literally threw it at the wall with fury because it was'nt working. I rang my brother ,who is a whizz with computers, and started ranting and raving and he asked me if the batteries were working? no i didnt realise that it needed batteries

 

[dg123]

A colleague and me were working on a system on separate PCs. I was trying to execute a command but it kept failing due to connection problems. He looked at the command on my screen, returned to his PC and pressed Ctrl-V (paste command) expecting it to appear on his screen!

 

[Richardp]

OK - as I said, who hasn't done something really daft with technology at some point? So here's your chance to 'fess up.

I'll start.

I once got a modem dialling number wrong, and when I tried to connect, the modem speaker made the usual bleeping noises, and then I got the voice of the person at the other end who'd answered the phone.

For some reason I then behaved as though my modem had become a speaker phone, and started talking at it, expecting the other person to be able to hear me....

This has happened to me a few times in Hotels trying to connect to the web with my laptop, then I get in a panic and start trying to put the hotel phone back together before the porter starts knocking on the door.
When I was a kid me and my mates were ringing doorbells and running when this one at mr whites house got jambed on, so i tried to free it and got caught!!! ooooch!
the door bell being the technology.

 

[masona]

I got fed with a company who wasn't answering their phone, so went round there and said "Doesn't anybody answer the phone here?"

Yes we do, try ringing this number because you cannot get though our fax machine number now I know why they make funny bleeping noises

 

[2scoops0406]

Spent about an hour diagnosing a network failure, re-installed drivers, reseated NIC, reboot machine, checked all routers down the line, put a netmon trace on machine, after about an hour, I finally plugged the ethernet cable into the NIC, Doh!!

 

[Moz]

OMG...

should this be renamed the PC confessionals fred..lol


being new to PCs an never touching one before
I set my mesh one 5 yrs ago up great ,
I turned it on
an read a few help books ,
but I kept turning it off at the plug ,
an wondered why it kept having a fit on booting ..lol


back to real world confesions , Nitty Gritty Fun ones

I slept with my mates sisterS, ... he had 3 ....sorry Jonno..

my best mate had 3 younger sisters an he adored them ,
all darlings an very cute ,
come their 16th parties ...
fair game ..
he never knew I currupted them always ...
an they loved it ,
to be 1st is a honour for any bloke but 3 sisters , lol ( to be honest , sharon , was a bit on the big boned size but she was best of the other 2 )


had a fight in a bus stop an got beat up

I was stood in a bus stop in my youth ,
an this guy get giving me snide looks ,
so I went an planted him I was well ****ed up
an then old bill turned up ,
an nicked me ,
I found out next day ,sun morn,
when I was given the boiled egg an piece of week stale toast I was being charged with D/D .. Drunk/Disorderly , better than fighting charge , ...Hurrah


til in the courts on monday morn ..lol

I was told I was found having a fight with the reflection of myself in the new glass bus stop hoarding ...I burst out laughing ..lol

I still got found £25 for D/D
funny thing is there is a clipping I have ...


It was the M.E.N report "Drunk man attacks thug an finds its himself "
that was in the 80s ..lol
my krazy youth ..lol


I have many more ....
very darker ones .......hmmm

do I get Absolution ????????

I feel the need to repent ..lol

 

[Steve]

Moz, i should have known you'd come out with some absolute crackers!!!

Fighting with your own reflection lmao!!!

 

[securespark]

There's always the classic blocked u bend.

You take it off and empty it out.




























Into the sink you've just removed it from...

 

[Gary_M]

There's always the classic blocked u bend.

You take it off and empty it out............

Into the sink you've just removed it from...

I did that yesterday - not once, but TWICE

 

[Adam_151]

There's always the classic blocked u bend.

You take it off and empty it out.


Into the sink you've just removed it from...

See, there is a reason you are securespark, and not secureplumb...

 

[Moz]

crafty1289
I got a better one ... in the M.E.N Proof for snides here ..lol

we had a fun park on new estate I moved too .. they blew up 2 years ago , salford park ,

I was dabbling as a young teen then on pills/booze ...

this party in the block was a fancy dress , my mate ,I said for some drugs would he get us some top fancy dress classy gear ...
Oh Yeah ..

come back later at petes flat on the newly opened estate

we were all crashed out , he took a bag of pills ...went

I awoke ...


looked in the bags ..oh no ..the monkey suit , (to be honest the suit then was a proper classic .. in the suit it had paws stitched an monkey feet , zipped in , it was a BOSS then .. but a downer for chatting women up ...

Dracula=Alan was there an I nearly threw up ... THAT COSTUME in this trippy party showed be getting you laid at best 1 an hour ,

Trying to talk too Alan , he is pretending he doesnt me an ape , my trying to rip off the head that has stuck on the zipper head ,

Funny thing I found thogh the all /women love a man monkek/hairy costume ...but them days like bib an brace ,,,no front opening ..

I was ****ed off , 2 bottles of vodka down to the skags hanging around ,
who cares ....
I got around there an was chummy , in my half drunk bottle of vodka , way !

then

I believe , I fell about as the druggies took half bottle , full bottle , OFF me

give me a kicking ... an laughed ...an tried to set me alight ..

I awoke , not at home , aching ...

quick thinking , Im here....

kill or be killed ,

as I ran down the stairs I saw a bloke like the Cybermen in black ,

he raised his arm an blackness ...


LOCKED UP


I got the baked bean breakfast , release ,

funniest was the news massive do in the M.E.N s

NEW SPG ..In MANC ...
full photos ,

all officers lined up

photo away in that paper ..


SPG in their new uniforms hauling /beating me ...in a monkey costume as I have my hands in surrender as blows go in ..lol.

cant believe it can you , officers then are still in the police force


I dont care its more my karma , I absorb my hate of them ...

its the drugs ...

 

[Deluks]

Moz. Proof that drugs DO have long term negative effects.

Are you sure it wasn't an Ian Brown suit?

 

[Moz]

Deluks

im cute guy still .......... very loved up


gonna get the big horror out , cut the gruipefruit , tease that sliky devil out ..

""Im off down sizing ... ....yum ..yum "

 

[hermes]

I remembered something daft I did a few years ago. At work we made a spraying-table from the base of an old office swivel-chair and an mdf top. Sometimes it would rotate when we didn't want it to so I thought it would be a good idea to drill a hole right through the stem so we could simply push a nail through the hole when necessary to stop it spinning.

I was kneeling down drilling the hole for ages before anything happened and when it did I was glad that I was doing it after everyone else had gone home because they would have pi**ed themselves at what happened.
It hadn't occured to me that the rise-and-fall mechanism on the chair operates by using compressed gas in the stem of the chair so that you just need to depress a lever and the gas will cause the seat to rise.

As I drilled into the stem there was a huge bang close to my face followed by the gas escaping rapidly around the drill bit. This gave me such a shock that I fell over backwards into a rack of veneered panels that had earlier been sprayed.
Four of the panels fell off the rack and one of them landed square on my head and nearly knocked me out. The others landed on the concrete floor and I had to re-spray them.
You are the first people I have told this to, at the time I explained the bruise on my forehead by saying I had banged it on the car door!