101 things to do with a goat
- Thread starter pickles
- Start date
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I had goat stew on holiday last year....yum.
Instead of buying an expensive paper shredder, buy a goat...they'll get rid of all paperwork for free 
...and while they're distracted with their paper-munching, you can do so much more with them
...as every decent goat-worrier knows...it's catching them that's the b*gger!
...and while they're distracted with their paper-munching, you can do so much more with them ...as every decent goat-worrier knows...it's catching them that's the b*gger!
I know it's an old one but still funny
A man was driving down a country road, and he decided to get out and get some fresh air. He got out, and started
walking in a field. As he walked, he came upon a hole. Wanting to see how deep it was, he threw a pebble down. No sound. So he threw a medium-sized rock down. No sound. The man started to get frustrated, so he threw a boulder down. No sound. As he searched about, he spotted a railway sleeper. He hauled it over to the hole, and shoved it in. No sound. He sat down on the ground, exhausted. Suddenly, he saw a goat running at him, full speed. He leaped up, and it brushed past him, and fell in the hole. He listened, but there was no sound. He sat down again. A few minutes later, a farmer came walking up. The man asked him, How deep is this hole?
The farmer said, Oh. Thats the bottomless pit. It never ends. Say, have you seen my prize goat?
The man, not wanting to get the blame, said, No.
The farmer said, Oh well. He can't get far. He was tied to a railway sleeper.
A man was driving down a country road, and he decided to get out and get some fresh air. He got out, and started
walking in a field. As he walked, he came upon a hole. Wanting to see how deep it was, he threw a pebble down. No sound. So he threw a medium-sized rock down. No sound. The man started to get frustrated, so he threw a boulder down. No sound. As he searched about, he spotted a railway sleeper. He hauled it over to the hole, and shoved it in. No sound. He sat down on the ground, exhausted. Suddenly, he saw a goat running at him, full speed. He leaped up, and it brushed past him, and fell in the hole. He listened, but there was no sound. He sat down again. A few minutes later, a farmer came walking up. The man asked him, How deep is this hole?
The farmer said, Oh. Thats the bottomless pit. It never ends. Say, have you seen my prize goat?
The man, not wanting to get the blame, said, No.
The farmer said, Oh well. He can't get far. He was tied to a railway sleeper.
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From
http://www.theregister.co.uk/2002/02/07/chef_has_sex_with_goat/
A man is awaiting sentencing after being found guilty of having sex with a goat. He was spotted by passengers on a packed train which stopped at signals opposite an allotment.
Stephen Hall, a 23-year-old chef, "lassoed" the goat with his belt and – then rammed it. Horrified commuters used their mobile phones to contact the police. OK, so there's not much in the way of an IT angle here, but some stories need writing.
Hall who says he is gay admitted the offence with the female goat but claims he’s never done anything like this before.
A senior British Transport policeman commented that he didn’t think the nanny goat was too upset by the ordeal but added that it is "difficult to tell". Goats are like that. Never can tell what they’re thinking.
What i can't understand is what the goat was doing on a packed train, perhaps it had been shopping
http://www.theregister.co.uk/2002/02/07/chef_has_sex_with_goat/
A man is awaiting sentencing after being found guilty of having sex with a goat. He was spotted by passengers on a packed train which stopped at signals opposite an allotment.
Stephen Hall, a 23-year-old chef, "lassoed" the goat with his belt and – then rammed it. Horrified commuters used their mobile phones to contact the police. OK, so there's not much in the way of an IT angle here, but some stories need writing.
Hall who says he is gay admitted the offence with the female goat but claims he’s never done anything like this before.
A senior British Transport policeman commented that he didn’t think the nanny goat was too upset by the ordeal but added that it is "difficult to tell". Goats are like that. Never can tell what they’re thinking.
What i can't understand is what the goat was doing on a packed train, perhaps it had been shopping
There was a thread somewhere about 'on or in'.
Like, we say get 'on' a train not 'in' a train.
Some one really ought to tell that chef that what his pal really said was, "Steve you get on my goat...!"
and not "Steve you get in my goat!!!"
Like, we say get 'on' a train not 'in' a train.
Some one really ought to tell that chef that what his pal really said was, "Steve you get on my goat...!"
and not "Steve you get in my goat!!!"
Love the story of the man who was forced to marry a goat as he had "used it as his wife"
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/africa/4748292.stm
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/africa/4748292.stm
pickles said:
Is it illegal?....damn.
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