How to explain the offside rule to women

[Johnmelad502]

You're in a shoe shop, second in the queue for the till. Behind the shop
assistant on the till is a pair of shoes which you have seen and which you
must have.

The shopper in front of you has seen them also and is eyeing them with
desire.

Both of you have forgotten your purses.

It would be totally rude to push in front of the first woman if you had no
money to pay for the shoes.

The shop assistant remains at the till waiting.

Your friend is trying on another pair of shoes at the back of the shop and
sees your dilemma.

She prepares to throw her purse to you.

If she does so, you can catch the purse, then walk round the other shopper
and buy the shoes.

At a pinch she could throw the purse ahead of the other shopper and, *whilst
it is in flight* you could nip around the other shopper, catch the purse and
buy the shoes.

Always remembering that until the purse has *actually been thrown* it would
be plain wrong to be forward of the other shopper.

There you go ladies!!!

 

[imamartian]

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!

 

[JMLanders]

this is like deja deja vu

 

[Lincsbodger]

Third time lucky..............

 

[lifesagasman]

Fore!!

 

[herebriefly]

JML502 obviously is blind to the fact this has been posted twice already.

 

[Johnmelad502]

JML502 obviously is blind to the fact this has been posted twice already.

Well, congratulations on knowing this little gem.

Fortunately, I don't have the time to spend my entire life on here reading every message that is posted.

The fact that I have posted it again will not mean that someone will be traumatised or damaged will it?

FFS, get a life.

 

[joinerjohn]

Well, congratulations on knowing this little gem.

Fortunately, I don't have the time to spend my entire life on here reading every message that is posted.

The fact that I have posted it again will not mean that someone will be traumatised or damaged will it?

Well, I for one have been severely traumatised by this double post.
Should I use " Injury Lawyers for You" or " www.wheretheresblametheresaclaim.scam

 

[Karinska]

Me too. I'm getting paranoid and starting to think that all these same posts are aimed at me specifically because I 'dare' to comment on football threads
Think I'm going to go and have a lie down in a darkened room to get over the trauma

 

[JMLanders]

This will be my 500th post in a very short time

Could we celebrate it by someone explaining to my wife the offside rule in language that she'll understand?

 

[Karinska]

This will be my 500th post in a very short time

Could we celebrate it by someone explaining to my wife the offside rule in language that she'll understand?

Why, are you saying she's not very bright?

 

[Lincsbodger]

Me too. I'm getting paranoid and starting to think that all these same posts are aimed at me specifically because I 'dare' to comment on football threads
Think I'm going to go and have a lie down in a darkened room to get over the trauma

Youve been warned of the dangers of dark rooms, you'll germinate. Seeds do.

 

[joinerjohn]

This will be my 500th post in a very short time

Could we celebrate it by someone explaining to my wife the offside rule in language that she'll understand?

You could ask Garth Crooks to explain the offside rule. Although I remember him being set up on a tv programme to explain it and he made a right pigs ear of it.

 

[Johnmelad502]

This will be my 500th post in a very short time

Could we celebrate it by someone explaining to my wife the offside rule in language that she'll understand?

What language does she speak?

 

[oompah]

Wouln't it be better to explain to footballers about the rule, the number of times they get caught offside they haven't quite grasped it yet.