can they get worse?

[kendor]

Kendor DNA = Deoxynucleic Acid

Not sure it belongs on this particular topic , but if you need to know more on this, there are course notes here from the molecular biophysics course I myself did back at uni.

There are PowerPoint presentations under "Course Documents".

I thought it stood for National Dyslexic Association

 

[AdamW]

D'oh, walked right into that one! You rapscallion! There was me, thinking you had an actual interest in genetics. Bah!

 

[securespark]

DeoxyriboNucleic Acid.

Sorry Adam!!

 

[securespark]

And I wondered why that popped up in the joke thread......didn't read pape 2....!! Berk....

 

[kendor]

A Scotsman walks into a bar with his jack russell buys a pint and sits down, whilst he is drinking the Barman notices the dog stand on it's hind legs jump up in the air and do a backward somersault
The Scotsman carries on drinking as if oblivious to this so the Barman asks why did he do that? To which the Scotsman replies "Celtic have just scored, Henrik Larsson the scorer", The Barman looks up at the TV but the match isn't on it, turns to the Scotsman and smiles "You had me going then" the Scotsman turns to the Barman and says " It's true he always does that when Larsson scores, if you don't believe me turn the channel over and see" .
So the Barman swaps channels and indeed the score is Celtic 1 Rangers 0
Larsson scored in the 10th minute, the Barman shakes his head in disbelief and says it must be a fluke, 20 mins later the jack russell jumps up and balancing on his front paws walks around in a circle
"Don't tell me" says the Barman "Larsson has scored again?"
"No" says the Scotsman "it was Chris Sutton this time he always does that when Sutton scores"
"Do me a favour says the Barman" and proceeds to check the channel again and sure enough this time Chris Sutton has scored
"That's absolutely amazing" said the Barman " I can't believe how clever that dog is, What does he do when Rangers score?"
"Dunno" says the Scotsman "I've only had him 2 Years".

 

[AdamW]

DeoxyriboNucleic Acid.

Sorry Adam!!

S*d off!

You are indeed correct. RNA = RiboNucleic Acid, DNA = DeoxyriboNucleic Acid. The ribo always throws me because I think "is it deoxyribonucleic acid?" and I think "nah, I'm getting mixed up with RNA".

This is terrible, in a period of a few days I manage to forget to use Ohm's law in a simple calculation AND I forget what DNA (correctly) stands for... It's these jokes, they're turning me daft!

Wouldn't be so embarassing if it wasn't for the fact that I studied Molecular Biophysics!

 

[Igorian]

You're not a decaying clone are you?

 

[pipme]

Much worse !!

Guy places biscuit box and a very quiet duck onto the bar.
He orders "Pint of best please squire".
"Coming up" says the landlord. " Why the duck then ?"
"Ah, she's my dancing duck" replies the customer.
"Can I see her dance?" asks landlord.
The customer picks up his duck, "She needs her special little stage for this". He places her on the tin box ... duck galvanises into action, dancing a fair old jig ... after a while the customer removes her to the bar.
"Amazing, I must buy her from you, how much?" Asks the landlord.
"Fifty quid" Says customer.
Landlord pays up, places his investment on box.. the duck dances flip, flappingly away.
Customer about to leave pauses at door, throws object to landlord ... "Oh, almost forgot, I usually throw in the other half of the candle for the fifty" .... He rapidly disappers.

P

 

[securespark]

Adam, as I have droned on about in posts gone by, I was chosen to be entered for AO (alternative ordinary) Human Biology exam at skool. T'was many moons ago, but the teaching was so good that 96% has stuck.

She used to make jokes about stuff, and if you laugh and make a joke of something, you remember it. Like T*t Ration..........or Titration!!
She made stuff easy to remember like arteries away, ie arteries carry blood away from heart, and the stomach sphincter closest to the heart is the cardiac sphincter.

So next time anybody reading this gets told by the quack their cardiac sphincter is playing up, don't think you've got a dicky ticker....it's just heartburn or reflux....

Indeed, there were 4 of us in the exam, and there was much laughter throughout the exam as we remembered certain topics!

I also copied all my notes from one book to another several times over: it helped me learn that way.

 

[Igorian]

I also copied all my notes from one book to another several times over: it helped me learn that way.

...And cos they didn't have photocopiers then!

 

[securespark]

As you copy it, you read it, and it sinks in. Most kids copy a load of stuff off the net and don't actually learn anything. Which is why my kids when they get to Secondary age will not be let loose on a copier or the internet....only under close paternal scrutiny.....

Actually, that sounds roooood doesn't it??!!

 

[kendor]

I also copied all my notes from one book to another several times over: it helped me learn that way.

...And cos they didn't have photocopiers then!
Or Electricity

 

[securespark]

May I respectfully remind posters of my year of birth....1966. Feeky Chucker!!

 

[kendor]

May I respectfully remind posters of my year of birth....1966. Feeky Chucker!!

In that case i'm keeping stum

 

[breezer]

two cows in a field, one says "MOOOOO"

the other says "i was going to say that"