legal advice - marriage breakdown

[Alarm]

Anyone that gets married wants their head examining.

So are you as thick as dogs poo then?

 

[Gasman28]

I've kissed lesbian friends, who have then kissed my girlfriend, tongues and all

So you are saying that Minnyme is a Lesbo too? Is there video evidence?

Your girlfriend needs to get a life.

Coming from you, I find that quite prophetic

 

[masona]

Sorry Big Tone but I stick to my original claim; there is no way that a 'snog' as you put it is reason enough to ditch a relationship that's stood for eight years. There's more to this than we can see.

Unless she's unhappy about something else or maybe she's impossible to live with

 

[Big Tone]

Sorry Big Tone but I stick to my original claim; there is no way that a 'snog' as you put it is reason enough to ditch a relationship that's stood for eight years. There's more to this than we can see.

Today a snog, tomorrow a snake wrestle. My girlfriend snogged a supposed mate and had his hand up her back trying to undo her bra. I forgave and we went on to marry. In our marriage she banged like a barn door on a windy day with another supposed mate of mine.

Once you see the spark you may as well throw in the towel before it turns into a bonfire IMO. And the same goes to women for unfaithful men. You may be able to work things out but the exception doesn’t prove the rule.

Jackanory: I have two very close friends I’ve known for about twenty years. They have been happily married, (or so I thought), for over twenty years. But a couple of years ago she confessed he had been off with another woman. She told me she had forgave but “if he ever does it again it’s over!”

I said to her once a cheater always a cheater and guess what he did again, and again and again?

They are still together and she now turns a blind eye to it. She doesn’t want to break up the family. When my family was broken because of my wife’s infidelity I knew the effect it would have on me and the relationship with my daughter. But there was no way I was going to stay! How could I make love to her without thinking of the betrayal and what they had done together?

I also thought what if an opportunity came my way in our marriage? I would probably have thought “well she did it so what good for the goose is good for the gander”. But that’s not the sort of person I am! Call me old fashioned but unfaithful doesn’t just mean ‘bumping uglies’ in my head. It’s a breach of trust and, like anything you break, even the finest repair doesn’t make it as strong as unbroken.

I’m sure it’s why I am alone to this day but at least I can’t get any unexpected surprises. Well, you did ask

Contrary to popular belief, alcohol and sex really don't mix. I know because I've tried and the results are disappointing. Keep your drinking days and your loving days separate.

Don’t quite agree Space cat. Hmmm.. memories of me and Rachel after I’d had two bottles of wine to myself. Let’s just say we broke our previous record, right through the night ‘till morning. It was a ‘score’ in a different numerical sense for her.

 

[Space cat]

Hmmm.. memories of me and Rachel after I’d had two bottles of wine to myself. Let’s just say we broke our previous record, right through the night ‘till morning.

Good for you. Though after two bottles of wine I'm surprized you can remember a thing about it.

It was a ‘score’ in a different numerical sense for her.

Well that just goes to show that size isn't everything. It's amazing what women can do with three quarters of an inch. Two in a row was the best I ever managed and that's ancient history now. On the other hand (no pun intended) she can make one last a hell of a long time.

PS: I've just spotted this:

-- two bottles of wine to myself

You didn't think to leave her some?

 

[joe-90]

If your woman or man strays it's because you aren't good enough at it yourself. Why not just become 'better'? Forget about trust and the other nonsense. Live in the world of today - leave your Victorian morals at home (like the Victorians did).

 

[Big Tone]

Hmmm.. memories of me and Rachel after I’d had two bottles of wine to myself. Let’s just say we broke our previous record, right through the night ‘till morning.

Good for you. Though after two bottles of wine I'm surprized you can remember a thing about it.

Oh I remember it well Space cat. I’m ashamed to say my tolerance was very high back then; bit of a problem which I am still trying to conquer if I’m honest.

It was a ‘score’ in a different numerical sense for her.

Well that just goes to show that size isn't everything. It's amazing what women can do with three quarters of an inch.

I think I could make you very happy with my three quarters of an inch. It’s like a baby’s arm holding an apple. (You’re husband isn’t looking over your shoulder I hope?)

PS: I've just spotted this:

-- two bottles of wine to myself

You didn't think to leave her some?

We bought three. Sadly, the naughtiness was the only way were compatible and the one I really love with a smokin’ body, great personality and SOH has zero commitment and sex drive. It’s been that long I bet it’s healed over.

Anyway, that’s my story. Next week, how I tried a man instead...

 

[Big Tone]

If your woman or man strays it's because you aren't good enough at it yourself. Why not just become 'better'? Forget about trust and the other nonsense. Live in the world of today - leave your Victorian morals at home (like the Victorians did).

If trust is unimportant to you that’s okay, but I don’t think it’s Victorian – it’s human nature. I happen to be the way I am not because of Victorian values but because in the same way, as an atheist, I don’t need to find my moral code from a book.

I treat others how I would want to be treated myself, it’s as simple as that. So then, I would be mortified if my partner caught me ‘in the act’ so I just wouldn’t do it.

If I felt that way about someone outside our commitment to each other I’d do the decent thing and call it a day because I’m in love, or lust, with another woman. Let's not forget if I would play the field behind her back I could potentially bring 'something' nasty back.

I wouldn’t leave my partner just because I’m not getting ‘it’, or enough of it either. Whether it’s once a day or once a year, if I felt loved and in a committed relationship less would still be enough.

I’m not a testosterone-filled 18 year old alpha-male trying to prove myself in some way. Sure, I have needs but I’m not an animal and if you respect and love your partner you wouldn’t stray. Nothing at all to do with Queen Lizzy or her grand mum...

 

[Space cat]

It’s like a baby’s arm holding an apple.

Sorry Tone but size really isn't everything - as any mermaid will tell you.

 

[Big Tone]

It’s like a baby’s arm holding an apple.

Sorry Tone but size really isn't everything - as any mermaid will tell you.

I’m just goofin’ about that Space cat; I’m quite average

It was a line from a film I saw, can’t remember what now, one of those gladiator sort.

I’m in agreement with you that it’s not the size of the ship but the motion of the ocean.

 

[Susiejb]

I'm saying nothing.

 

[Big Tone]

I'll say something and maybe disappear again because I don't like how 'here' always descends into a slagging match...

Without wishing to break the '30 second law of deepness', I guess it comes down to what a couple or partnership is prepared to accept, endure or forgive.

What I am prepared to accept, endure or forgive is very obviously different to yours Joe and probably diametrically opposed to the O/P dbaplaya – I don’t know him personally.

I think someone levelled at dbaplaya why he didn’t just seek a forum which specialises on these matters. Well, IMHO, what you are going to get, in his defense, is a professional ‘take’ instead of a personal or friendly one.

Are ‘professionals’ the ultimate arbiters of right and wrong?

I think you are more often than not likely to get a more honest and impartial response from a forum sometimes, or friends. It does, of course, depend on the evidence and truth submitted.

A poster can easily elicit the ‘right’ response on a forum which is submitted by said poster. I remember a quote from my past which went something like this: “there are two people in life who will tell you the truth about yourself; your best friend and your worst enemy”.

Mills and Boon or truth? We will never know and whether it matters or not is a moot point in the age of hype and digital bull faeces ...

What I post is my opinion and that is all! It may be right, for me, or very wrong. But we all have our opinion on matters.

We now, in 2011, have more access to information and enlightenment than at any time in mankind’s sordid history. This should make us better, you would think, but that's a separate thread...

 

[enyam]

We now, in 2011, have more access to information and enlightenment than at any time in mankind’s sordid history. This should make us better, you would think, but that's a separate thread...

Perversely that is why we are maybe not better there is too much info and enlightenment,or maybe information in the wrong hands is a dangerous concept.

 

[Alarm]

I happen to think "Big Tone" is spot on. Trust is the foundation of any relationship. It is not an old value to be forgotten. Also a "dry patch" of the physical side is not an invitation to wander off and dip your wick elsewhere. And that goes for the women too!

If someone strays there is a more indepth reason than a quick shag. It is down to each obviously how they react to the event.

For some to preach their way is the only way and put down others is a disgrace. We know who I am on about here I believe. As before everyone will react differently, a blanket reason just ignores freedom of speech. Especially when its indicated that is the only way.

There have been opinions formed here over this thread, some funny some dire.
I think the point is asking such a serious question on a general discussion site as a first post was not the brightest of ideas.

 

[noseall]

Can anyone remember the last time the O.P. responded?

Oh, i forgot, this is the G.D. section. Who gives a toss about the O.P as long as ego's are massaged.