smacking kids

[scott1968]

My 14 year old is better educated than you.

Can you not get it into your thick head hitting anyone is wrong?
Especially a young defenceless child.

Do you not know the difference between right and wrong?

Spanking is hitting. Hitting is violence. A child should not learn that violence solves problems. Many spanked children (also, and often as grown-ups) find themselves confused, disoriented and/or humiliated.

Grown-ups make MUCH bigger mistakes than children do (often on purpose too), and how often is a grown-up undressed and spanked (in court for example)?

Spanking in schools was banned in Italy in 1865, in Finland in 1890. A total ban on spanking children was made in Sweden in late 70's - they were the first country on our planet to ban it. Most of Europe has banned it since (large parts of Africa too). Canada did it in the summer of 2004.
Spanking is not educating a child. It's teaching the child how to feel humiliation and shame for having done wrong according to your (personal or enforced) moral believes.
Spanking your children is education as much as throwing rocks at them.

 

[joe-90]

That's all very well, but what do YOU propose we do about it?

I ask (yet) again:

Now tell me (how many times must I ask), how would YOU deal with a 14 year old that attacks his teachers and bullies his peers.


joe

BTW, Scott, where did you pick up your racist slant on the English?

 

[scott1968]

That's all very well, but what do YOU propose we do about it?

I ask (yet) again:

Now tell me (how many times must I ask), how would YOU deal with a 14 year old that attacks his teachers and bullies his peers.


joe

BTW, Scott, where did you pick up your racist slant on the English?

You're in the wrong debate we are talking about hitting children,
You must be old

I would not hit the 14 year old,
my children have been educated from very young and it works.


When was the last time you hit your wife and did it work?
When was the last time someone hit you and did it work?


Scott.

Come on England for the world cup

 

[joe-90]

You can't answer the question can you?

Now tell me (how many times must I ask), how would YOU deal with a 14 year old that attacks his teachers and bullies his peers.




joe

 

[Glassman]

When I were a kid I had two punishments. The First was a Grounding (usually for a week at a time) and the second was a good hiding (usually from my mum who wore the trousers in our house).

I was only ever smacked for things like bad-mouthing the next door neighbour but more often than not I was Grounded as punishment.

Being stuck in the house and not being able to go out when all my mates were over the fields playing footy had the biggest effect and I used to consider this more of a punishment than a smacking.
However, I dont see any harm in parents wanting to smack their own children when they see fit and I am the first to get annoyed when interfering do-gooders step in to have a go at parents for how they bring their kids up.

I used to get smacked in front of my mates but you could guarantee that 10 minutes later I'd be laughing and joking about it. It's an old cliche but it really didn't do me any harm. In fact it kept me on my toes when my mum was around because I'd always get a thick ear for something when I was least expecting it. I turned out alright (I think??)

It's funny how most topics one here seem to go so far off the original subject.

 

[scott1968]

You can't answer the question can you?

Now tell me (how many times must I ask), how would YOU deal with a 14 year old that attacks his teachers and bullies his peers.




joe

It's simple you punish them (without hitting them),
You can not punish hitting with hitting it does not work.

Now answer my questions?

I have to go I’am going to beat up some pensioners,
they are easy targets too.

Scott

 

[splinter]

johnnyt,
, a sergent major spanking his privates, never!!!! not in public anyway

 

[scott1968]

When I were a kid I had two punishments. The First was a Grounding (usually for a week at a time) and the second was a good hiding (usually from my mum who wore the trousers in our house).

I was only ever smacked for things like bad-mouthing the next door neighbour but more often than not I was Grounded as punishment.

Being stuck in the house and not being able to go out when all my mates were over the fields playing footy had the biggest effect and I used to consider this more of a punishment than a smacking.
However, I dont see any harm in parents wanting to smack their own children when they see fit and I am the first to get annoyed when interfering do-gooders step in to have a go at parents for how they bring their kids up.

I used to get smacked in front of my mates but you could guarantee that 10 minutes later I'd be laughing and joking about it. It's an old cliche but it really didn't do me any harm. In fact it kept me on my toes when my mum was around because I'd always get a thick ear for something when I was least expecting it. I turned out alright (I think??)

It's funny how most topics one here seem to go so far off the original subject.

You will never know if it effected you,
but I know plenty it has effected

 

[joe-90]

You can't answer the question can you?

Now tell me (how many times must I ask), how would YOU deal with a 14 year old that attacks his teachers and bullies his peers.




joe

It's simple you punish them (without hitting them),
You can not punish hitting with hitting it does not work.

Now answer my questions?

I have to go I’am going to beat up some pensioners,
they are easy targets too.

Scott

How do you punish them?

 

[Glassman]

You will never know if it effected you,
but I know plenty it has effected

Well I dont have a criminal record and I dont go about treating people like idiots. Has it occurred to you that some people are just born to be scumbags?

To me being smakced was a nromal part of growing up and I did have a lot of respect for my parents.

 

[noodlz]

Ever see any of those programmes with child psychologists like Dr Tanya Byron? Sometimes what can be achieved through psychological techniques is amazing. The older the children are, having more set habits, the more difficult it is to deal with, but there's always a way with most children and teenagers without resorting to hitting. Just, it's not that easy for parents to know how to apply them, so the smack gets an instant result.

I personally don't condemn people who smack their children in certain circumstances, but just think there is a better way, if people take the trouble to learn a different approach.

Appreciate that there does appear to be a greater lack of respect from children and maybe in extreme cases more stringent methods should be applied such as a form of boot camp for unruly teens who might endanger others or themselves through violence.

 

[ban-all-sheds]

MOD 2

this thread (and quite a few others) have been running all day without your antagonistic intervention . end of !

and i might add two wrongs don't make a right

 

[ban-all-sheds]

MOD2 - you do realise, don't you, that I am NEVER going to stop complaining about the way you delete posts and refuse to explain why.

Rather than just delete it, please tell me which parts of this you find unacceptable, and so contrary to the rules that it has to be deleted, and why:

Moderator

If you want to contribute to this debate on 'smacking kids' please do so. If you want to verbally attack other members, it will not be tolerated and will be removed without further reason.

 

[ban-all-sheds]

If you want to contribute to this debate on 'smacking kids' please do so.

Ah yes - contributing to the debate:

EDIT - Oh look - I'm not allowed to point out how other people are allowed to make posts that do not contribute to the debate, without censorship.

But if you want a contribution to the debate on smacking kids, I'll oblige.

I agree with Softus, scott1968 & Kelinik, and not the piffle that joe-90 talks.

Hitting children is wrong.

Hitting children is child abuse.

Anyone who thinks it's OK to hit children is in favour of child abuse.

Being in favour of child abuse is disgusting.

Therefore the views of someone who thinks it's OK to hit children are disgusting.

 

[johnny_t]

So, to recap, this thread started off about a six-year old that occasionaly gets a bit crazy, to which we had many useful suggestion to eliminate environmental factors and to which Joe's solution is 'Give them a smack' and its has somehow managed to get round to a 14-year old with a knife, to which Joe's solution is 'Give them a smack'. En route, we have been through discipline in the army, to which the implied solution has been 'Give them a smack' as well.

Whenever anyone has suggested that the solution to some of these problems comes from analysing the root cause, we have been derided for not stating a solution to the hypothetical 14-year old. Given that we know nothing about him apart from the fact he is 14, has a knife and a potty-mouth, and doesn't exist, it is impossible to give an answer. In the case of the real 6-year old, I think Toffee has been given some fair pointers.

Joe has repeatedly suggested that he has 'won'. In a debate, you 'win' when everyone else rubs thir chin and says 'You know, I think Old Joe is right after all'. I would suggest we haven't reached that point yet. It isn't even necessary to win, but normally a show of hands would decide it.

Joe, I would suggest that your recollection of growing up on an enormous council estate, a 1000-pupil school, and there not being one badly-behaved child either there or in the whole of the 1960's is rose-tinted at best.

I would also question how old you are. For some reason, the mental picture I have from things you have said in the past is that you are around 33 or 34. From that, I would also contend that you or anyone in your school were never given 'Six of the Best'

I would also suggest that the whole issue of yobbishness can be summed up as a lack of respect for others and their views. Do you consider that your heartily-smacked childhood has turned you into a respectful adult ? I imagine that more of the 'yobs' that we see on the streets today have been smacked and shouted at in their lives than haven't.

And finally, you need to answer my earlier question about what to do if your golden smack does not work. Could a policeman break a yob's arm to teach him some respect ? Would it be acceptable for a teacher to assault a teenage girl in order to break her spirit and make her behave, or would you be writing a stiff letter to the head if your daughter came home and told you that ?

As has been said, its a complex issue. Britain does seem to have an increasing yob-culture, but it can only be cured by getting at the cause, not through violence. If you can't understand that, you are part of the problem, not part of the solution.