Things people say

[dingbat]

I am having trouble seeing what you mean by ersatz beef... Is this a reference to them selling poor quality meat that shouldn't really be sold as beef due to it being mainly fat?

Ersatz: adj substitute, fake.

I actually saw, in a major supermarket, handwritten signs in the meat section which read, "Beef", "Pork", "Lamb", etc. The point being that they should be selling Beef, Pork and Lamb. Putting the words in quotation marks makes it read as "Let's call it beef".

 

[AdamW]

Oh, I see! I hadn't realised the quotation marks were part of the sign... I knew what ersatz meant, hence I was wondering why "Beef" would be a meaty imposter.

 

[IanSF]

Like the French use of 'donc' at the end of a phrase, I find that more and more people seem to use 'so' at the end of a statement, leaving you to fill in the rest for yourself. By way of reply, I usually force them to finish whatever it was they were trying to say before they ran out of vocabulary.
My daughter is the major culprit in this but my wife is picking it up as well. Another annoying habit my daughter has is when describing a previous conversation with someone else. "I said this and So-and-so said that, then I said whatever and So-and-so 'turned around' and said something else. I have visions of these people spinning about while talking.

 

[AdamW]

I caught myself saying "basically" this morning... I was so ashamed I actually stopped what I was saying, shook my head and apologised for using the word "basically" too much.

I now have an image of people spinning round whilst talking too! The problem with repeating conversations is that they are never so interesting to a third party.

I am a repeat offender of stretching a sentence too far. That is, I will say what I mean to say, but my brain is telling me "Go on, there's more! SAY IT!". So I will say something along the lines of "Don't worry, I will get that report written by Monday *brain whispers* and erm.. so, erm... yeh." I hate it, but I do it.

 

[AdamW]

I saw this stand-up comedian who pointed out that Geordies are always looking for similes:

"I was walking down the street, like..."

"I'm feeling pretty good, like..."

 

[smiths]

I am a repeat offender of stretching a sentence too far. That is, I will say what I mean to say, but my brain is telling me "Go on, there's more! SAY IT!". So I will say something along the lines of "Don't worry, I will get that report written by Monday *brain whispers* and erm.. so, erm... yeh." I hate it, but I do it.

Do you think you go on? Really?

 

[securespark]

Read the book "eats shoots and leaves" for a laugh about mis-punctuation!

I get uptight by language that is commonplace these days: using unecessary words where a simpler shorter phrase would do.

Example-

"on a daily basis" - "every day"

Also, I hate americanisms, both phrases and pronunciation:

"There you go" instead of "Here you are"

Harrass with the emphasis on second syllable.

If someone said to you:

"I didn't know you had dandruff."

Would your reply be (assuming that you did not have it)

"I don't"

or

"I haven't"??

 

[TexMex]

What about "Who left that whatever, however"

For instance, next time someone says to you, "Who left that light on?"
The obvious answer, "Everyone in the whole wide world. After all, if just one person had bothered to turn it off, it would be off now, wouldn't it?"

What about that gaff that Murray Walker once came out with. "and the car that Schumaker is driving is absolutely unique. There's not another like it in the world. Except the one in front, which is absolutely identical of course!"

and John Lowe, comentating on a snooker match. "Now Ray Reardon is going for the pink, and for those of you watching in black and white, that's the one beside the blue!"

 

[ninebob]

Ah yes, "murrayisms" - like these:


"And now excuse me while I interrupt myself..."

"He's obviously gone in for a wheel change. I say obviously because I can't see it."

"He is shedding buckets of adrenaline in that car."

"It's raining and the track is wet."

"...he can see him in his earphones..."

"...and there's no damage to the car... except to the car itself..."

"Alboreto into the pits and I'm going to stop the startwatch."

"There is nothing wrong with the car except that it is on fire."

"There is a man with a great Grand Prix future behind him."

Murray: "And there are flames coming from the back of Prost's car as he enters the swimming pool."
James Hunt: "Well, that should put them out then."

Murray: "What's that? There's a body on the track!"
James Hunt: "I think that that is a piece of bodywork from someone's car."

"Do my eyes deceive me, or is Senna's Lotus sounding rough?"

"It's not quite a curve, it's a straight actually."

"This is an interesting circuit because it has inclines, and not just up, but down as well."

"Only a few more laps to go and then the action will begin, unless this is the action, which it is."

"Tambay's hopes, which were nil before, are absolutely zero now."

"And he's lost both right front tires."

"The Benetton handling superbly as ever. Williams have worked very very hard on this car at the beginning of the season."

"The atmosphere is so tense you could cut it with a cricket stump."

"And we have had five races so far this year, Brazil, Argentina, Imola, Schumacher and Monaco."

"And Schumacher overtakes Villeneuve... oh, no he doesn't.... oh, yes he does!"

"And this is Ralf Schumacher, the youngest driver in Formula 1 at only 21 years old, and of course he is the son of twice world champion Michael!"

 

[dingbat]

I get uptight by language that is commonplace these days: using unecessary words where a simpler shorter phrase would do.

"Personally, I think..." and "Me, personally..."

Whenever a business spokesman starts a sentence with "Going forward..." (unnecessary in any case if he's using the future tense) and then goes on to include words like, ongoing, future, projections, forecast, outcome, etc.

And those dreadful vox pops where the MITS ends up trotting out one cliche after another. "Well, er, me personally, I mean, at the end of the day it's like, you know... if it's meant to be... you have to give 110 percent you know, twenty-four-seven, six days week, just do it, like."

 

[AdamW]

Of course, this does go to show just what a clever thing the human brain is: even when someone is saying something incorrect, we can figure out (americanism ) what they mean.

I just received an e-mail from an administrator asking me "Can you fill in this form?" Do you think I should reply back saying "Yes, I believe that is within my capability. Can you touch your elbow with your tongue?"

There was a brilliant episode of "Jeeves and Wooster", set in New York (yes I know it is a televisation of the novels!). Jeeves orders some food in a diner, the waitress says "A burger and a cup of coffee - you got it!". Jeeves, being a very literal man, looks surprised and says "I do not believe I have".

Oh, that reminds me of another one: the insistance of putting in z's where there should be an s. E.g. "realize" instead of "realise".

Oh, and "Plumb Center".

 

[kendor]

Professor Stanley Unwin would be turning in his grave!

 

[AdamW]

I have often wondered if Unwin was an inspiration to the dialect in "A Clockwork Orange". However, I have only seen Kubrick's film, never read the book. So for all I know it predates Unwin.

Can anyone shed light on this?

 

[dingbat]

Oh, that reminds me of another one: the insistance of putting in z's where there should be an s. E.g. "realize" instead of "realise".

No, sadly, that's correct. Check with the OED. It's just unpopular... and slightly vulgar.

 

[dingbat]

I have often wondered if Unwin was an inspiration to the dialect in "A Clockwork Orange". However, I have only seen Kubrick's film, never read the book. So for all I know it predates Unwin.

Can anyone shed light on this?

Nadsat, the vernacular spoken by the youngsters in CO is an Anglo-Russian slang derived by Burgess and used to show the youth of his novel as a society apart. It's effective and quite clever.

Stanley Unwins gobbledeygook, on the other hand is a work of pure genius, based entirely on English.

Hope that helps.