World cup...

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In preparation for the World Cup, the "offside rule" explained for women:

You're in a shoe shop, second in the queue for the till. Behind the shop assistant on the till is a pair of shoes which you have seen and which you must have.

The female shopper in front of you has seen them also and is eyeing them with desire. Both of you have forgotten your purses.

It would be rude to push in front of the first woman if you had no money to pay for the shoes.

The shop assistant remains at the till waiting.

Your friend is trying on another pair of shoes at the back of the shop and sees your dilemma.

She prepares to throw her purse to you.

If she does so, you can catch the purse, then walk round the other shopper and buy the shoes!

At a pinch she could throw the purse ahead of the other shopper and "whilst it is in flight" you could nip around the other shopper, catch the purse and buy the shoes!

BUT, you must always remember that until the purse has "actually been thrown", it would be plain wrong for you to be in front of the other shopper and you would be OFFSIDE!
 
Oh, I don't think you'd have to pay dear. I'm sure there are plenty of women who'd be only too happy to slap you around for free

corrrr, are you offering? Bring plenty of rope if you are, I like to be tied up first. :LOL:
 
England's 23-man squad for the World Cup finals:

Goalkeepers: Joe Hart (Manchester City), David James (Portsmouth), Robert Green (West Ham).

Defenders: Jamie Carragher (Liverpool), Ashley Cole (Chelsea), Rio Ferdinand (Manchester United), Glen Johnson (Liverpool), Ledley King (Tottenham), John Terry (Chelsea), Matthew Upson (West Ham), Stephen Warnock (Aston Villa).

Midfielders: Gareth Barry (Manchester City), Michael Carrick (Manchester United), Joe Cole (Chelsea), Steven Gerrard (Liverpool), Frank Lampard (Chelsea), Aaron Lennon (Tottenham), James Milner (Aston Villa), Shaun Wright-Phillips (Manchester City).

Forwards: Peter Crouch (Tottenham), Jermain Defoe (Tottenham), Emile Heskey (Aston Villa), Wayne Rooney (Manchester United).
I thought Walcott would have been in instead of Wright-Phillips but what do I know, the rest pretty much as expected.
 
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Yeah, thanks for that PBD. Hope it wasn't for my benefit as you seem to be confusing football with rugby :eek: :eek:

Apart from that, it seems to be pretty much the same as what I said but not quite so clearly :rolleyes:

If you're a very good boy, maybe I'll explain the offside 'trap' and 'diving' to you sometime ;)
 
If you're a very good boy, maybe I'll explain the offside 'trap' and 'diving' to you sometime
This diving business might interest me :LOL:
 
If, as seems likely that Ferdinand is out,who should be made captain Terry? if that happened it would be a bit contradictory.Rooney? i think he should be told to concentrate on scoring goals,some one who is going to play every game Lampard or Gerrard?
 
With Ferdinand out, that has improved Englands chances, out of form crock, should have never been on the plane.
The Capts arm band goes to Stevie G.
 
If, as seems likely that Ferdinand is out,who should be made captain Terry? if that happened it would be a bit contradictory.Rooney? i think he should be told to concentrate on scoring goals,some one who is going to play every game Lampard or Gerrard?

Should have been Gerrard from the start

We'll have a better chance no that Rio is out, Dawson will replace him and hes a better player
 
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